Trans men and misogyny

Michea B
4 min readJan 10, 2021

TW: Discussions of violence, mentions of sex or sexwork in the articles.

A question that I see in many of the circles I move in has been whether trans masculine people (trans men and masculine leaning non-binary people as well as others under the trans umbrella) can experience and even perform toxic masculinity. Hopefully the links below, as well as the discussion of my own experiences as a trans masculine person, can help clear some of that up.

Starting off by stating I’m a trans masc non-binary person who tends to just use the term trans man when describing myself outside LGBTQIA2S+ circles.

So the short answer to this is that yes, trans men can be the bearers of and perform toxic masculinity. In some cases it’s done as a survival method, where when they come out they’re expected to perform the same forms of masculinity as their cis peers, or in some cases it’s to try to “prove they’re man enough” to be considered men.

When I first came out, I was told by multiple cis men that I would need to not only get better at fighting, but that I would need to prepare to fight and constantly be ready to assert my dominance through beating down another person if they tried to make me submissive to them. They told me that I would need to constantly be ready to “throw down” either verbally or physically to prove I’m really a man, and that by showing signs of submissiveness I would be considered to just be a woman wearing manface (they used a few slurs, so I’m changing it to that).

It was the same with how I was expected to present. It was expected that I ALWAYS present masculine and any showing of femininity would just prove that I wasn’t really a man. It was expected that I in many ways perform masculinity MORE than my cis counterparts to make up for my inherent femininity, even if that meant dipping into toxic levels of masculinity.

Over time, I have moved away from that and found a mix of healthy femininity and masculinity, but I still get comments over and over about how a “real man” would or wouldn’t do something based on either hyper or toxic masculine views.

One can see it in the wild, so to speak, in some trans masc or trans men groups here on Facebook and elsewhere, where they embrace the toxic aspects of masculinity either due to feeling like they have to prove they are “real men” or for some other reason. I’m going to provide some reading material both…

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Michea B

Queer|Pronouns he/they. Owner of Illuminatus Design. Degrees in Interdisciplinary Studies (GSWS, Psychology, English) & Theology (M:Div)